Little in my life has compared to becoming a grandparent. The indescribable joy is difficult, if not impossible, to convey. Usually, when I find myself in the middle of a mood funk, I often have to sleep it off and resolve to try another day. But since becoming Nanee, two sweet faces can immediately alter that Eeyore position and transform me into my super-powered alter ego.
After six doctor’s appointments within two days, the threat of icy weather, and my husband believing that he missed his Mario Andretti calling as we maneuvered through the late afternoon city traffic yesterday, I was purely exhausted and cranky. As we pulled up to our home, I stated in no uncertain terms that it was nothing less than by the grace of God that we arrived home safely. And I meant that at least a hundred percent.
Then our son, daughter-in-law, and grandbabies pulled up. “Mr. Andretti” rolled down his window and told them to meet us inside. Before he got the window back up, I heard an excited, “Nanee…” The thoughts of crawling up the stairs and falling into my bed melted from my mind when I saw the most handsome brown-eyed boy and sweet curly-haired girl pop through the door right behind us. I don’t know who to give credit to, but as has been previously stated, they are by far my favorite hello and saddest goodbyes.
Usually, when they get to Nanee and Pa’s, it’s game on! Though we moved slightly slower after a taxing day, it still only took us minutes to get ready for some fun. I tried to pop a couple of Tums Smoothies undetected since we had just eaten. The problem with that was Hal Joy does not miss one thing. Not one. But “I want one!” was quickly resolved by the candy man, yet another famous role for Pa. Tucked in a kitchen drawer, waiting for just the right moment or any moment really, were candy necklaces for both!
Candy and the two yes people you have at your beck and call, what else could two toddlers want?
We read about hot rods, had races, had a car show, played with a purple dinosaur (not Barney), and pulled out a favorite, the play-doh.
Hallie likes to smash and squish her play-doh. Honestly, I may have shared that as one of my stress relief techniques pertinent for even adulthood. She immediately smiled and demolished it after I cut out her purple heart—our here for the fun, girl, with the mischievous but equally endearing personality was ready for more as I quickly rolled up some play-doh smash balls.
Hudson intervened and asked me to make him a heart, too. It took only seconds between his sister’s smashing. I laid it softly in his almost-four-year-old hand. I’m confessing now, he could say he pooped, and it would probably hold some profound meaning for me. But this sentence no doubt did. ” Do you want to hold my heart, Nanee?” was his simple request. I may have gulped a bit and then answered with three words of pure conviction, “Yes, I do.”
I opened my hand for that purple play-doh heart, and I held it. Then a little later, I carefully laid it on a wooden ledge where I left it to dry, with a few of my secret tears.
I want to save both of their little hearts. I want to hold them tenderly and protect them. I want to whisk them away to Never, Never Land with all of its promises; a place of dreams, where hearts never get broken, hurt, in despair, neglected, mourn, feel helpless, sorrowful, or afflicted—a place where play-doh hearts made to last, are cherished for all time.
I know that is impossible. This world encompasses the contrary.
The only part I can promise is Jesus, someday in a faraway land not made of fairy tales, will lead us to even better. In the meantime, I will attempt to model his ways and keep wide open arms for the good, bad, and ugly. And I will.
Hoping you find a place in my space. ♥
Reflection question:
What do you hope for your precious grandchildren if blessed with this role? Or it could be another child in your life.
Bonus tip: Squishing and smashing play-doh at any age is highly recommended by Nanee and Hallie. It helps if you say SQUISH or SMASH IT with childhood expression.